Monday, September 8, 2008

Lily Whiteness and Romance - Future Husband Application



"It is a safe thing to trust Him to fulfill the desire which He creates." - Amy Carmichael

Set Apart for my Future Husband

Just as we are set apart for Christ, we must also be set apart for our future husband. Many Christians have committed to be physically pure for their husbands, but Leslie instead encourages living a lifestyle of lily-whiteness for your Prince. "my commitment to my future husband needed to go far beyond the physical realm."

Proverbs 31:12, "She does [her husband] good and not evil ALL the days of her life."

Practical Steps for Loving Your Future Husband:

Set-Apartness:
- Do I seek male affirmation through flirting, hugging, touching, etc? - Do I draw guy's attention by showing off my body? "(you know, bending down to pick something up at just the right moment, or wearing that oh-so-cute top that also happens to leave little to the imagination)" - Do I casually offer my heart, mind, emotions, and body to guys by jumping into short term flings? - Do I allow my mind to fantasize about guys I'm attracted to? - Do I offer to much of myself to guy, even in friendship? - Am I willing to sacrifice pleasure, attention, affirmation, and temporary fulfillment to live a lifestyle of lily whiteness for the man I will spend the rest of my life with? -Am I willing to allow my faithful Lord to bring a love story into my life in His own perfect time and way? - Am I willing to hand over the pen of my love story to Christ and trust him completely?

A Vision of Warrior Poets by Eric Ludy

Leslie's husband, Eric, wrote several chapters within the book "Authentic Beauty" addressing the Study of Manhood for young ladies. "A Key ingredient to a girl becoming a woman is learning to truly understand the manhood of Christ, and then learning to help the males in her life transform into Christ-like princes."

Eric references the great Scottish Hero, William Wallace. "My generation of men rarely sees the blend of courage and kindness, of strength and sensitivity, of bravery and servanthood that we see in the fiery eyes of Sir William Wallace...He was the epitome of fearlessness in the face of the gravest danger. Yet, at the same time, he was the embodiment of heartfelt compassion."

How Warrior Poets are Made

Many women wonder if warrior poets even exist. Was William Wallace just a once-every-seven-hundred-years kinda guy? Eric doesn't think so. He says:

"A dominant force behind the quality of modern masculinity in our culture is the expectations of modern women. The feminist movement led to great freedom for women, but not without cost. The great tragedy of feminism is that it has locked masculinity in a perverted cellar where it is nearly impossible for masculinity to transform itself." "It would be misleading to say to you that men don't have a weakness in the sexual-preoccupation department. But this weakness has been turned into an expectation." "Men need someone to believe in them. They need someone to tell them that they can rise above this mediocrity." "The words of my princess make me a prince."

Possible-Warrior-Poets are all around us, waiting for that word of encouragement from his sister in Christ, or from his Princess, or his sister, or his daughter for them to go that extra mile.

Putting It Into Action:

1. Practice making princes out of the men in your life. "Start with your dad and brother(s). If you can learn to be a prince maker in your relationships with them, you will be off-the-charts amazing in your potential future relationship with your groom. Go out of your way to mention that you notice things they have done well...or the times you see them modeling a picture of manhood that you respect."

2. Challenge men to a higher standard. "If you simply have a sweet, cheerful confidence in the standard you are holding out for, it can cause a guy to stop and think twice about his behavior."
Some examples:
a. "If they burp or do anything else in the gross family, say very sweetly something like, "I've heard that burping is considered very attractive to the bearded, one-eyed, yak worshiping women of Hanalei, but unfortunately most girls don't find it very charming!" b. "If they hesitate to help someone in need, comment (again very sweetly) something akin to, "This job demands a man with great strength and massive biceps," then look his way and, with a tilt of your head and adding a slight lilt to your voice, say, "Ahhh, here is the man of bulging biceps who will surely save the day!" c. "If they refer to womanhood in a derogatory fashion, be quick to gently add, "I've heard that the men who speak highly of femininity are the ones who end up with the most beautiful wives." d. If they attempt to pressure you to sacrifice your sacred innocence, quickly leave them in the dust, and in your parting, say something like, "You have the potential to be a great man. And when you are, you will be a protector rather than a conqueror of a woman's innocence."

3. Ponder the manhood of Christ. Eric suggests the book of Song of Solomon and the book of Revelation together with, "the sole intention of seeing a picture of what Christlike manhood looks like...Song of Solomon gives a picture of Christ as a poet, a gentle encourager, and a servant-lover. Revelation provides a picture of Christ as a conqueror, a hero, a Warrior of warriors, and a King of kings. As a young woman, acquaint yourself with hte ultimate warrior poet, Jesus Christ, and then you will know better what manhood is supposed to look like."

4. Become a student of manhood.


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2 comments:

Kimberly said...

I love your "I loves". It's fun that you have such an extensive list. I was wondering about the "riding in the back of pick up trucks" though... mmmhmmm.

Mary said...

good wisdom :)